A little late (sorry), Nikki Glaser’s opening speech
The comedian began his monologue by calling the awards ceremony a “Ozempic’s biggest night” and told Paramount+ viewers: “You have six days left to cancel your free trial. »
“I have to say, I feel like I’ve finally made it.” You know, I’m in a room full of producers at the Beverly Hilton hotel, and this time I have all my clothes onsaid Nikki Glaser, causing big laughs. It was worth it. »
« Wicked, Queer, Nightbitch…these aren’t just words Ben Affleck screams after having an orgasm, these are some of the incredible films nominated tonight. »
Then : « The Bear, The Penguin, Mon Petit Renne…these aren’t just things found in Robert F Kennedy’s freezer, these are series named tonight. »
Glaser took aim at Denis Villeneuve’s sci-fi film by praising Zendaya: “You were amazing in Dune 2oh my God. I woke up to all your scenes! » As for Zendaya’s other film, Challengers ? “This movie was more sexually charged than P. Diddy’s credit card!” »
Speaking about the music mogul accused of rape, Nikki Glaser said: “I’m sorry, I’m angry too. The afterparty won’t be up to par this year, but we need to move on. »
Before praising his performance as Bob Dylan in A complete strangerthe presenter took aim at Chalamet’s mustache, saying: “You have the most beautiful eyelashes on your upper lip. »
Then she continued: “We can’t talk about movies tonight without talking about Wicked. I didn’t know much about Wicked before this year, because I had friends in high school. Everyone loved it Wicked. I loved it Wicked, my boyfriend loved it Wickedmy boyfriend’s boyfriend really loved it Wicked. Pour Wickedsome people complained that the film was ruined by audience members singing. And to Joker Folie à Deuxpeople complained that the film was ruined by the images on the screen and the music that accompanied them. »
Of the musical starring Joaquin Phoenix and Lady Gaga and which received no Golden Globe nominations, Glaser said: “I’m sorry, Joker Folie à Deux. Where is their table? Oh, that’s right, they’re not here. »
“Thank you for working so hard”she then told Nicole Kidman, the star of Babygirlsitting next to her country music star husband. “And thanks to Keith Urban for playing guitar at home so much that she wants to go away and make 18 movies a year!” »
Nikki Glaser also praised the “double Holocaust survivor” Adrien Brody, in reference to his roles in The Brutalist in 2024 and The Pianist in 2002.
Nikki Glaser ended her speech by recalling “that if you lose tonight, keep in mind that the purpose of art is not to win a prize, the purpose of art is to launch a brand of tequila so popular that you will no longer have never to make art.”
