Ille-et-Vilaine: a mother recounts her struggle with her son’s troubles

Her story may be that of other parents. And this is one of the reasons why Elodie, a 34 year old motherdecided to take the floor to deliver his testimony.

That of a mother who raises her son alone, who suffers from dyspraxiaa learning disorder that disrupts the daily life and schooling of adolescents 15 years.

“Pierre (not his real name) is atypical. He’s just not coded like everyone else,” presents Elodie. Installed today in the Country of VitréElodie and Pierre have always had a “very close” relationship, as her mother confides.

A strong relationship that allows the duo to face the worries of everyday life.

“He didn’t fit into the boxes”

It all started in Pierre’s early years. “I started to have some suspicions when he started walking. He had difficulty holding his cutlery. He often fell. »

At school, the first problems appear. “He had difficulty socializing with others. But I told myself that maybe he was having trouble getting into the swing of things. »

But as the years go by, schooling becomes difficult in establishments in the Pays de Vitré and Fougères.

Pierre didn’t fit into the boxes. He had difficulty concentrating. Very often, he was at the back of the class.

For several years, Pierre also suffered harassment. Then in CM2 class, Elodie experiences “a descent into hell” with her son.

“He was harassed there and he was humiliated by students. His things and his snack were stolen. His teacher took a dislike to him too,” whispers Elodie. Pierre will not finish the school year and will be expelled after having “hit” three children in response to yet another harassment. “I didn’t understand, because he had never been violent,” continues Elodie.

“He will live with it all his life”

At that moment, Pierre is followed by a Medical-psycho-pedagogical center (CMPP). He has had sessions with the occupational therapist and a psychomotor therapist since CP.

“He was being monitored, but I still didn’t have a diagnosis. I didn’t understand why he was like that. » It was from a neurologist that the diagnosis was made in 2019: Pierre suffered from dyspraxia with attention deficit disorder.

“He will live with it for the rest of his life. He’s just starting to accept it. »

Quickly, Elodie took the necessary steps for Pierre to be accompanied. These include procedures with the Departmental House for Disabled People (MDPH) or a request for a school assistant (AVS).

Elodie’s professional life also finds itself turned upside down. “I had taken time off to help him get organized, with homework, etc. »

Elodie also finds out, often on her own, about possible techniques to best support Pierre. The college years in Fougères went rather well. “He had regained his confidence and had friends. »

The start of the year in a professional baccalaureate also goes well, but as the months go by, the situation deteriorates.

Fatigue built up and he was asked to pace at a pace that he couldn’t keep up with. He was at boarding school and was having a hard time being locked up in his room from 10 p.m. until morning.

“A big blow”

Following an incident at the boarding school where he accidentally sets off the fire alarm, Pierre goes to the disciplinary council. “It went very badly. He had to be punished, but it was clearly his judgment. »

Pierre is then excluded.

It was taken very violently. It was a big blow with only a few days of classes remaining.

Since this episode, a few days ago, Pierre has been out of school. A situation that worries Elodie, currently training to become a caregiver.

“It’s been an obstacle course since he was little. Sometimes I feel helpless and misunderstood. It has always been injustice and incomprehension. I find that the teaching staff are not authorized and trained to support this type of student. This sets them up for failure and psychological distress,” regrets Elodie, who is linked to associations where parents discuss their problems.

“Make it as autonomous as possible”

In this delicate context, there is some clarity on the table. Pierre must resume training at the MFR in Janzé at the start of the school year. With his mother, they visited the establishment and both were seduced by the management’s speech.

“We were very reassured by our visit. The director is great. Children with different disabilities are welcomed. Pierre will be able to choose his school life assistant,” confides Elodie, “confident” about this return to school.

But the latter will not happen without sacrifice for her. “I’m going to have to take availability and we’re going to have to move. My goal is to make him as independent as possible,” concludes the 34-year-old mother.

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