The Cross : When did you get sick?
Bénédicte Draillard: For a year, I had been having epileptic seizures without knowing it. It made it very difficult for me to work. I therefore resigned from the position of deputy mayor of the 5th arrondissement of Lyon which I occupied at the time. I went to see a neurologist at the beginning of February. She thought my problem was psychological or related to overwork. I demanded an examination. She reluctantly gave me a prescription for an EEG. I went into the hospital to have it, and I never left.
On examination, a huge brain tumor was discovered. The intern who was on call that day knelt down to talk to me, eye to eye, and made me understand that I only had a few months to live.
How did you react?
B. D. : I was ready to die. I, who am naturally worried, a kind of grace of peace, of acceptance without question fell on me. I started palliative care. But my family and friends protested: “We need time to swallow the news. If you don't do anything, you'll leave too quickly. We would like you to undergo treatment. » I ended up accepting. It was not my will, but I did it with joy. My brothers and sisters were very present, and with angelic patience.
I underwent chemo and radiation to slow the progression of the tumor. I was very well looked after. But I was declining more and more, I had difficulty walking and speaking. On Easter Day, I received the sacrament of the sick from a priest friend who came from Lyon. During the prayer he said: “We ask for the healing of Bénédicte. » This revolted me: “I am not asking for my healing, you have no right to ask for it for me. » He got angry in his turn: “What right do you have to stop me from asking for it for you?” » This was decisive. I let my hands be laid on me. In fact, I wanted to die.
For what reason?
B. D. : I have been personally affected by the abuse cases. Living in Lyon, I knew victims of Bernard Preynat. I myself lived eighteen years in community in the Fraternity of Mary, Queen Immaculate, led at the time by a disciple of Marie-Dominique Philippe.
I denounced spiritual abuse and control problems there, but I recently learned that sexual abuse had also been committed. I was afraid of discovering things in the report that was to come out that I didn't know. For me, this anxiety is very linked to my illness and my proximity to death: I did not want to read this report.
Yet you are still here…
B. D. : One fine day, I started to feel better. I had the planned follow-up MRI. The tumor had shrunk considerably. The radiotherapist, who called himself an atheist, kept exclaiming: “I’ve never seen that, it’s a miracle!” » Laughing, he asked me: “Your parents didn’t go to Lourdes, by any chance?” »
He didn't know that I still had my parents and that they had just returned from Lourdes. At 90 years old, they went to pray for me with friends. Many people have prayed for me, many children, those of my friends or listeners of the podcast “The Junior Bible Saga” that I produce. This means a lot to me who is single and without children.
Two months later, a new MRI confirmed the strong regression of the tumor. I started chemotherapy again in the hope that it would go away. I still have two sessions left. Today it is tiny. I can read and write again.
Are you rejoicing, are you “joying,” to see your life prolonged like this?
B. D. : I am delighted with this interview for The Crosswhich gives me a voice on something other than abuse. I am happy to be able to be a witness of hope, to be able to say that I am not afraid of death because for me, it opens onto union with Christ. I rejoice at having been well cared for, I give thanks for the children's prayers for me, for the concern of my family.
Finally, I rejoice in life itself. A new life is beginning for me… I will be able to advance two projects that are close to my heart: continuing podcasts for children and offering support at the funeral home for grieving families.
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Her inspiration: a prayer from Chiara Lubich
” I love you. Because you entered my life more than the air in my lungs. More than the blood in my veins. That you arrived where no one could enter. When no one could help me. Every time no one could console me. »
Excerpt from the meditation prayer “I love you”, by Chiara Lubich.
