« Chis day is branded in my memory. Unfortunately, I don’t think I will ever be able to forget it…” Ten years ago, on January 9, 2015, Michel Catalano, boss of the Création Tendance Découverte printing company in Dammartin-en-Goële (Seine-et-Marne ), was taken hostage in the premises of his company by the terrorist brothers Chérif and Saïd Kouachi, perpetrators of the attack on the premises of Charlie Hebdo in which 12 people were killed two days earlier. For more than eight hours, the terrorists took refuge in Michel Catalano’s printing works, before being shot down by the GIGN.
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Ten years later, Michel Catalano released a work soberly entitled The Printer of Dammartin (Le Cherche-Midi edition). In this little book, he recounts the hostage-taking, his link with the terrorists, the GIGN assault but above all the difficulties encountered afterwards. And if he is better today, the traumas of that day still haunt him. “Ten years, already,” he whispers. It’s still so present in my mind that I find it hard to believe. Ten years of my life… It’s huge, and it goes by so quickly… And after everything we’ve been through, I thought I would approach these ten years with serenity, but ultimately, like every year at this time, I fell ill . I have the flu. These ten years, I feel them psychologically but also physically. My body remembers. »
“Do you recognize us? »
On January 9, 2015, in the early morning, Michel Catalano was at his office as usual. He’s slightly late. Two days earlier, on January 7, he celebrated his 48th birthday. It is 8:25 a.m. when the doorbell at the entrance to his printing house rings. He is waiting for a supplier. But instead of the latter, the Kouachi brothers show up. “Do you recognize us? » they ask the printer. The latter acquiesces. Then began the hostage-taking at the Dammartin-en-Goële printing works.
Ten years later, he remembers the smallest details of this tragic day. For example, he remembers the number of steps that separated him from the terrorists when he met them: “16 steps, 8 meters. » “And this is not a simple detail for me. I counted them to focus on something other than the fact that I was heading towards death. » Their faces also remain engraved in his mind. Worse, seeing them ten years later causes “a knee-jerk reaction”.
ALSO READ Montrouge attack: “Don’t forget Clarissa the policewoman” He also remembers the coffee he served to Saïd Kouachi, the eldest. A very symbolic drink for this man of Italian origin: “Coffee is an institution at home and in Italy. It’s a moment of pleasure, but also of relaxation. » During the assault, the elder’s cup remained intact and full. It took Michel Catalano several months to empty this beverage. “I couldn’t figure out what this coffee symbolized. A café of life or a café of death? Coffee having always been a moment of relaxation for me, often shared with people I liked, knowing that I had shared a coffee with death made the task complex. What did he represent? I don’t know. That’s why it took me a while to throw it away. »
When asked about coffee, Michel Catalano admits that although he continued to drink coffee after the hostage taking, his taste had changed. “I was anesthetized. That’s it. I continued to drink coffee, because it was a habit, but I could no longer find that pleasure. I had lost the taste for coffee, but for everything really, for life in general. »
-The “war scene” and reconstruction
During the liberation of the printing house, almost eight hundred bullets were fired by law enforcement. “When the assault was launched, I had the impression that it lasted forever, hearing every gunshot, every explosion,” recalls Michel Catalano. And even today, ten years later, when he sees the images of the assault again, the memories arise instantly.
Following this “war scene” all that remained of his business was a ruin. A second trauma for Michel Catalano. It took years to rebuild his business. “The negotiations with insurance companies, the delays in subsidies, the permanent deficits… All this at a time when I was suffering psychologically. I was exhausted, empty. And I believed the false promises, those who told me that it wasn’t going to be too complicated. Certainly, I needed this hope. But in reality, it was very hard. »
ALSO READ Hyper Cacher: “Ten years ago, I walked in puddles of blood” With a bit of pride, Michel Catalano still announces that, according to his forecasts, the financial balance sheet of his printing house for this year should be the first since 2014 to be in balance: “My printing house is not a simple business. Despite all the difficulties, we never closed. We rebuilt everything in one place. [L’inauguration de la nouvelle imprimerie a eu lieu le 29 septembre 2016 en présence du président François Hollande, NDLR]. This company has real soul. So, I am delighted that after ten years, knock on wood, normally, we should find financial balance. »
“I accepted that I was no longer the same man”
These last years have also been devoted to his psychological reconstruction. How to learn to live with the “blunders” of certain journalists, yet another trauma. How to open up to those close to you? “In recent years, I have accepted that I am no longer the same man. I have new phobias. I don’t feel very good in the dark. I’m afraid of MRIs. I am hypervigilant. I had to relearn how to smile and joke. I rebuilt my printing house, and well, it’s the same… But I also have a new approach to life. I am more thoughtful and have acquired a new artistic and philosophical sensitivity. I’m putting things into perspective more, and it’s for the best. In reality, I realize that this whole life isn’t any worse. That it’s not any worse to relax with a book in your garden, instead of always being in the action. Today I am able to sit and contemplate. »
ALSO READ Ten years after “Charlie Hebdo”, should we still fear the terrorist threat? And one person can understand him in his fight: Lilian, his employee who remained hidden during the entire hostage-taking, curled up under a sink. It was Michel Catalano’s obsession during the sequestration. And a real relationship was created, still present ten years later: “We have a unique bond, which goes beyond the family. Even though he was hidden during the hostage taking, he remained present with me. It’s thanks to him that I kept calm, he gave me strength. And we continue to see each other once or twice a year, with always the same pleasure. It’s my ray of sunshine when I see it. »
A desire for a dream
To Discover
Kangaroo of the day
Answer
Then there was September 16, 2020, the day of his testimony at the trial of the January 2015 attacks. Taking part in this trial was not an easy task. For an hour and a half, Michel Catalano gave his testimony. “The trial was a very important and very difficult stage for the victims and for me too. My testimony was extremely hard because it allowed me to understand how difficult “the aftermath” had been. I was able to turn a page that day. »
ALSO READ Ten years after the attacks, what remains of Charlie’s spirit? So it’s true, Michel Catalano confesses, “the nightmare in my head is not over” and the road is still long. He talks about his sleep. Because, yes, since this dramatic date of January 9, 2015, the printer from Dammartin no longer dreams: “I had nightmares for a long time, in which the Kouachi brothers executed me. I was afraid of going crazy! Over the years, the nightmares disappeared, but the dreams never returned. And that scares me. Could I ever dream again? I hope so. »
