Laurent Gerra’s column from January 15, 2025

François Bayrou delivered his general policy speech on January 14 before the National Assembly. A speech “highly anticipated and variously appreciated” according to Miss Jade who received the Prime Minister this morning on RTL: “I cannot let you say that my speech was variously appreciated. I had drunk a ‘viandox’ just before. My ears were all red and the audience was absolutely fired up. I made five recalls and several ‘standing ovations’”, replies the guest. “It was more of a call to order from the President of the Assembly. And the standing ovations were deputies who were screaming against your measures,” adds the host. “This is not the opinion of my supporters who sent me numerous messages of congratulations and encouragement: ‘LOL’, ‘PTDR’ and ‘LOL’”, he replies.

The duo Chevallier and Laspalès was also on set to talk about the Paris-Clermont train line. “Hello sir, I would like a train ticket to Clermont-Ferrand, I am going to my cousin’s wedding,” said Chevallier. “You know that one in two marriages ends in divorce. If I were you, I would stay at home. You risk going there for nothing,” replies Laspalès. “Since you insist, I have a train leaving for 2 p.m.”, for an arrival at 3 p.m. “An hour to do Paris-Clermont? It’s really fast,” marvels Chevallier. The second responds, “No, not an hour, 25 hours! He arrives at 3 p.m., but the next day!”

Finally, the singer Eddy Mitchell came to talk about cinema at Jade’s microphone, notably with the release of ‘Baby Girl’a sulphurous erotic thriller with Nicole Kidman devoured by her desires. “Sulphurous, that’s easy to say. In my humble opinion, it doesn’t happen to the ‘ankle’Those who love me will grab my rear with Jessica Boobs and Tommy Latub that Mr Sotto has in his DVD collection” says Eddy Mitchell. “Lucasfilm has announced three new Star Wars whose action will take place 25,000 years in the past compared to the last trilogy”, continues Mademoiselle Jade. The singer responds: “Return to the past is in fashion and it is not the only example since in France , the film ‘Park Policy’inspired by Jurassic Park, itself returns 25,000 years in the past with François Bayrou in Matignon, an old dinosaur with a big head and big ears who escapes from his nature reserve in Pau to sow discord in Paris. .

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