Judith, 75 years old, and Moïse, 85 years old, preferred to testify on condition of anonymity. But “we have nothing to hide” when it comes to talking about love and sexuality.
They met seventeen months ago “exactly in April. We were outside, the weather was nice. We talked. On July 17, we started seeing each other,” recalls Judith, who has lived for five years at the Le Panama long-stay center in Saint-Pierre-le-Moûtier in Nièvre. Moïse left his bags there two years ago. They immediately liked each other. “We have things in common,” explains Moïse. Judith confirms: “We have the same ideas on everything”.
Lock the door with keys
This love develops through words and caresses. In the hallways, they hold hands, kiss each other. The couple would like to go further. He regrets not having “privacy.” Caregivers and residents come in and out.”
“The residents don’t bother,” regrets the octogenarian who recounts this moment when his partner was washing and someone entered. “We’ve seen each other naked before. I undress in front of him,” explains Judith. This frustrates Moses who is always afraid that someone will surprise them.
What he wants “is a lock” on the door to Judith’s room, the scene of their lovemaking. “It is bigger” than that of Moses located at the end of the corridor.
“He asked to get closer to her because when he arrived, he lived on the first floor,” intervenes Séverine Papin, the neuropsychologist at the medico-social establishment of the Nièvre territorial hospital group. Just with this little catch “we would go beyond the things we haven’t been able to do until now”.
Even though they spend most of their time together among Judith’s objects and memories, they do not sleep together. “We can’t, the bed is too small. But we would like to. What we’re missing is a bed next door,” points out Judith.
It’s a platonic love in a sense but we wish it wasn’t.
Moïse, who wants to point out that they are an “old married” couple, jokes Judith. “A normal couple,” smiles his companion who has thought about entering into a civil partnership. A normal couple having fun.
“She has diapers. It’s something I didn’t know about but which I respect. » Judith became incontinent after cancer. A cancer that took away Moses’ wife. “My wife said to me, ‘You need to find someone. You can’t stay like this.” »
The widower will take thirteen years to find love again with Judith. “I had a few stories of not much. » “Oh well, I didn’t know,” says Judith, who herself is “divorced twice and widowed for almost nine years”.
With her second husband, she did not have sexual relations, “he couldn’t”.
