in tears, Cindy Fabre confides in her premature birth under general anesthesia

They did everything to have a baby, yet nothing went as planned when it arrived. This was the subject of today’s discussion in “It starts today” this Thursday on France 2. Among the guests of Faustine Bollaert, the director of the Miss France competition, Cindy Fabre . Mother of a 12-year-old teenager named Élio, the former beauty queen fought to get pregnant at the age of 26, while going through the PMA box. She recounted this painful episode in her life.

« We are moving into a hyper-medicalized world where, suddenly, your desire to become a mother and to be a parent takes second place. “, she begins by explaining before describing daily injections and regular ultrasounds. “Your relationship suffers, your family too… It is a source of tension because the medical profession is focused on this pregnancy, you are a patient and a number and no longer a future mother”she deciphers. Her first attempt at IVF proved successful.

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But pregnancy is not easy. “ I had a complicated eight months, because it was a risky pregnancy, the risk of losing the child until the birthtestifies Cindy Fabre. It prevents us from projecting ourselves, from investing ourselves, from imagining ourselves as mothers. I made up my son’s room at the last minute. Every month, I had a different announcement: be careful, the exams are not good”she remembers.

After seven months, after a hemorrhage, she spent a week under observation in the hospital. Her baby will be born three weeks later, a month before the original due date due to further bleeding. Childbirth under general anesthesia. “ And there it is a cold shower, we say to ourselves: “what is it that requires me to fall asleep?” They tie my arms and tell me that there are too many risks », relates the one who succeeded Sylvie Tellier.

« I admit, it will take me a year to form a bond with my son”

Cindy Fabre

In tears, she described the abrupt awakening where caregivers urged her to hold her child as she struggled to open her eyes. She then feels a strong feeling of guilt “. Worse, in the weeks that followed, Cindy Fabre was unable to form a bond with her child. Firstly because she cannot provide first aid. “I was amorphous », recalls Miss France 2005.

« I didn’t feel anything. I wondered if it was my child. Who could assure me of this? I told myself that I wasn’t necessarily born to be a mother”continues the 39-year-old Dijonnaise. “ I admit, it will take me a year to form a bond with my son, the trauma was long “, she admits. In question, the anesthesia which caused him amnesia. “ I no longer remember the four days following Elio’s birth. I only cling to the photos”.

The trigger came thanks to his son. “ My anxieties dissipated when he grew up, I recognized character traits. My mother has a dimple on her right cheek, I have one and when Élio started to smile, her dimple appeared. And then I said to myself: “yes it’s mine””she declares with a smile. The boss of the Misses told the story to Élio. “ I’m not going to make her believe that Santa Claus exists and that the pregnancy was idyllic. I tell him that he was the most combative cell and that it will follow him all his life », she concludes on a positive note.