[SATIRE À VUE] Grenoble: welcome to an accommodating metropolis

At the microphone of France Info, the mayor of Grenoble has no other solution to propose than to put up with the violence of the drug dealers who are rampant in his city.

A representative of the “Bisounours company” is the guest of France Info this Thursday. In accordance with the speed he imposed in his city, Éric Piolle came at 30 km/h to the capital. In his pink car, he crossed towns less peaceful than his own. In Grenoble, signs warn visitors: they are entering a haven of peace and love. “Welcome to a peaceful metropolis”. It's written on it. Each entrance has its own sign. The laws of repetition comedy are like this.

The journalist responsible for interviewing the peacemaker notes, however, that residents cannot access certain buildings due to the presence of numerous drug dealers. Should we see this as a hint of a disruption of the cocoon in which Grenoblois live together?

What a babe ! Eric Piolle has the situation in hand: “In any case, we have to find a modus vivendi with the dealers and we see that it is more and more difficult. » In addition to his comic talent, the councilor speaks Latin fluently. For non-bilinguals, Larousse translates for us way of life : “Agreement allowing two parties in dispute to accommodate a situation by reserving the solution of the dispute. »

Welcome to an accommodating metropolis

The costs of changing the signs will be offset by the fines imposed on motorists who drive at 35 km/h. Crazy drivers, scoundrels. A real scourge! But let's return to the ambient sweetness. The elected official notes that “The dealers are now organized multinationals, who exploit people who are younger and younger and more and more lost. » Between the multinational of renunciation and that of violence, there is a way to get along. One watches, the other tampers. A notable progress is noted by the editorial staff of France info.

In the field, Éric Piolle sometimes ventures out. Before it was good, conviviality reigned: “I saw the evolution over my ten years in office… I went everywhere I talked with everyone”. Shake hands, pat on the back, how are you? The jokes were flying. “Now I go everywhere, the dialogue can be more complicated at certain points. » At this stage, you must consult the Larousse de novlang. According to the eco academy, “the dialogue may be more complicated” means that the mayor is insulted copiously and that he must leave before the situation turns sour. “For a mayor who runs fast.” The hook for the next campaign will be impactful. 12 seconds between a building and its company car. The latest timing places Éric Piolle at the top of the surveys carried out among the bobo community. On the real measures proposed to combat the phenomenon, again Latin: Motion and sewn mouth.