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Paul El Kharrat (Les 12 coups de midi) talks about his suicidal thoughts

May the Best Win returns this Friday, November 22. Always presented by Anne-Sophie Girard and Philippe Lellouche, this general knowledge program sees 200 people divided by age categories compete against each other. And to train generation Z (18 to 29 years old) it is the former champion of 12 shots of noon Paul El Kharrat who was chosen. On the occasion of this new role, the ex-acolyte of Jean-Luc Reichmann gave an interview to Tele-Leisure during which he also returned to his books, his private life and his media career.

Media coverage is nice“: Paul El Kharrat looks back on his various participations in Traitorsto Big Headshas Welcome to the monastery…

Tele-Leisure : The questions of May the best win! on M6 being multiple choice questions, did you have the right answers each time?
Paul El Kharrat:
I think that no human being in this country and on this Earth has all the answers to the questions that are asked in the context of a game show. I learned things which for some were current, factual and others which were more within my reach because precisely it was the past.

What was the reaction of the candidates on your team when they knew you would be their coach?
They were very satisfied. I wasn't able to ask my entire team the question but my immediate neighbors were rather delighted to see that I was the team leader. I was able to observe a certain desire on the part of the other groups too. I heard phrases like: “How do you want us to win? What have you put in front of us?“It was good-natured and so, when I made a mistake, it was clear that I was not missed.

You are a chronicler of Big Heads, you participated in the Traitorswe saw you in Welcome to the monastery on C8. Do you enjoy being in the media?
It's part of surpassing oneself and the ability to integrate socially too. Something that was much more complicated years ago and continues to be so at irregular intervals. But media coverage, as long as it is beneficial, is pleasant.

In the monastery, you were rather close to your comrades. Have you kept in touch with any of them?
I kept in touch with some friends. Especially Fabienne Carat, whom I knew before and Clara Morgane, whom I had also met before the show. Sometimes we send each other messages to get news but nothing more.

I may have dark thoughts“: Paul El Kharrat confides in his suicidal thoughts

After Welcome to the monasterywe saw you in 50 Minutes Inside where you talked about your suicidal impulses. Is it better today?
I still have suicidal thoughts at irregular intervals. It depends on my depressive phases. In fact, they are concomitant. When I'm in a depressive phase, I can sometimes have dark thoughts. I talk about it to acquaintances, friends, but not friends. When people ask me if I'm okay, unlike many others, I don't tend to lie and say “I'm okay” when it's not okay. I honestly say it's average. It's not easy to manage on a daily basis and I take refuge in reading, in writing, I listen to music

You are writing a new book. Can you tell us more about the subject?
It's a book written together with a journalist and my mother. It's going to be about the relationship my family, especially my mom, has with me and autism. We talk about the course of my life before the diagnosis and then from 2015 when I got it. How my loved ones behaved towards me and how I experienced it. The means for recognizing people with disabilities who have ASD (autism spectrum disorder) will also be presented.

On Instagram, you also declare that you would like to be in a relationship. But you're not ready. Are you working on it?
Feelings don't work much. Emotions maybe a little more. In any case, nurturing a feeling of love is really something very complicated. I explained it several years ago already on the set of Jordan De Luxe, that I seemed to have experienced the beginnings of feelings of irrepressible attachment towards someone but she ghosted me, she abandoned me so I stopped. I think it's the first testimony of what love could have been. But I can't be sure of anything at all, and even less of that feeling.

If you could be on any show you wanted, which one would you appear on?
I already made a joker in Who wants to make millions but I would like to participate as a candidate. But I think it's a bit compromised, they're afraid I'll break the box. Redo Fort Boyard also that would be interesting. But above all I want to show my humorous side and for that I would very much like to participate in LOL who laughs comes out.

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