“I was 4 years old when it started”: a victim of Raël’s sect recounts the psychological and sexual violence she suffered

Lydia Hadjara is trying to rebuild herself. And that's no small feat. It has now been 17 years since she fled the sect of Raël, a Frenchman who proclaimed himself a prophet, and who, at 78, lives in Japan, surrounded by young followers. But the violence she suffered is written in her flesh, as she reveals in a book “I was her slave” (City Éditions). To understand how she got there, you have to go back years.

“I entered this sect through my parent, the one who gave birth to me. I was 4 years old”she tells Audrey Crespo-Mara in the replay of Portrait of the Week at the top of this article. “The doctrine of this movement is that we were created by extra-terrestrials, who are 25,000 years ahead of us, in the laboratory and Raël is there to represent them and create an embassy for them so that they can come to Earth”, she explains.

“Everyone kisses, everyone hugs”

From a very young age, sexuality was omnipresent within the movement. “Already, in Raël's books, it is written that we must open children up to sexuality very early. Everyone kisses, everyone hugs. It's very tactile”, she said. At nine years old, Lydia is spotted by Raël. “I'm at the edge of the pool, he comes to see me and it's as if I had seen Mickey. I saw the prophet, the brother of Jesus. They sold him like that to me. So I was amazed. He told me that I was very pretty and that we were going to spend time together later.”she testifies, adding that her mother was “delighted.” “She lived through that. Her need for recognition was satisfied”she assures.

And then the unspeakable begins: “I had to start giving fellatio very early on. The year I was 13 with a guide who was close to the prophet,” she blurted, her eyes shining. “At first, he saw that I was reluctant and he said to me: ‘I’m going to teach you so you can please the prophet’”, she adds. The teenager will even be raped. She is barely 15 years old. “It's for learning. It's for Raël. I'm going to be able to really serve him. I'm starting to get disgusted with myself. I'm starting to hate myself. I'm starting to not feel good”, she blurted.

I didn't yet know at the time that I was under the influence. I didn't realize, but I was drinking in his words

Lydia Hadjara

Looking back, Lydia portrays the personality of this lawless guru as someone “very intelligent and very egocentric.” “Everything revolves around him and he's a born manipulator. Even when we catch him lying, we think it's us who are wrong. And then, he's angry,” she further details. However, the young woman admits that she was fascinated. “I didn't yet know at the time that I was under the influence. I didn't realize it, but I was drinking in his words. I saw him, I had chills. He was my idol, he was my It was my reason for living actually. I was four years old when it started. she recalls.

When she comes of age, the young woman will have her first sexual relationship with Raël. “He must have been 55 or 56 years old”she emphasizes. She has not forgotten this moment. “We went up to his room. He had a double room because on the other side, there was his official partner. So, there, he asks me to undress (…) He sees that I am not very comfortable and he said to me: 'You know, you're going to do me good. You will save this humanity by doing good to your prophet'. I can't say no, I'm privileged, I'm lucky. I'm useful. My body was there, my mind was not there.”she says, while recognizing: “It disgusts me and I want to vomit.” Did his mother approve? “She never considered me as much as during that period. She was very proud that her daughter was one of Raël’s chosen ones”she remembers.

However, Lydia will have to satisfy the guru's slightest sexual desires, even the most obscene. In these moments, “my mind detaches itself from my body (…) I'll think about everything except what's happening. And then I take showers. And then I feel dirty. I think it's a feeling that I will still have a long time”, she fears. But the worst part of it all was that she didn't want to lose this supposedly privileged place. “I had the love of my progenitor, I had the gaze of the other Raelians, I had the last of the prophets who considered me”, she argues.

• Read also

  Order of the Solar Temple: 30 years ago, the beginning of the end for the sect after the discovery of the massacres in Switzerland

At 25, however, the young woman found the strength to leave this sect. The trigger is a punishment given by Raël. “There, it was shameful, I disappointed the prophet and I don’t know, my brain must have said stop”she remembers. A final night followed, the worst, according to her. “Because there, he branded me like you brand an animal. I was hurt and the next day, I ran away”she says. But Lydia admits, she never filed a complaint.

“Because for me, he was untouchable and until not very long ago, it was my fault. How do you tell a judge: 'He raped me and I stayed?' How do I make someone understand that? It took me years to really talk about it.” she says. And she admits it: “Raël still haunts me today”. As for his mother, she is still in the sect. “I haven’t had any news for about 16 years”she concludes.