Lost in the depths of Brittany, the city of Brest has 140,000 inhabitants and a club that doesn’t look like much: Stade Brestois 29. For several years, the Brest club has continued to prove that it is one of the greatest and it is without fear that we announce that he is a serious contender for the Champions League. Here’s why:
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#29. Brest abandons Ligue 1 to focus on Europe
Let’s let small teams like Paris and Monaco play the championship.
#28. 2-1 against the 2nd best Austrian club
Title holder, SK Sturm Graz, all the same.
#27. 4-0 against the best Austrian club
Sponsored by Red Bull, Salzburg, anyway.
#26. 4 million euros in your pocket
Two victories in the Champions League means 4 million euros won. What to buy Griezmann.
#25. 4 million is six months of payroll
Enough to increase the players’ salaries. Better paid players = better performance.
#24. Abdallah Sima, more goals in the Champions League than in the championships
#23. The exterior of Ludovic Ajorque’s foot
Modrić, please take an example.
#22. Marco Bizot’s judgments
Haaland and Mbappé sweating in front of the Dutch wall.
#21. Mama Baldé’s controls
The meme of Zizou who goes “oh there there” after Ronaldo’s acrobatic return.
#20. Mahdi Camara’s cross strikes
#19. The flat foot at the entrance to the surface of Mathias Pereira Lage
It smells like the Ballon d’Or.
#18. Leverkusen is takeable
They are in decline.
#17. Sparta Prague, it’s takeable
#16. PSV Eindhoven, it’s takeable
Average club, average city.
#15. Shakhtar Donetsk, c’est prenable
Always there to lose, them.
#14. FC Barcelona is takeable
It’s not like their striker is capable of scoring five goals in nine minutes.
#13. Real Madrid, we play the sidelines
We have to give the kids some playing time.
#12. Home-and-away matches are a game-changer
No more cut-throat Coupe de France matches that are played in one match.
#11. Brest carries the entire French UEFA index on its shoulders
It is under pressure that the Bretons are better.
#10. Roudourou, a powerful ally
What’s better than going to play with the enemy to face another? The guys’ mentality, all the same.
#9. If we follow the club’s line of evolution, Brest wins the Champions League
14th in 2023, 3rd in 2024, just have to lift the big-eared cup, eh.
#8. Brest, it starts like Brazil
The country of football. Both love the sun. It’s all the same.
#7. Brest, it rhymes with best
The English invented football, Brest magnified it.
#6. Brest rhymes with “3-0 final victory against Manchester City”
Haaland who signed for Brest the following year as a ball boy.
#5. The chorus of the Champions League anthem literally quotes SB29
“The masters, the Brestenthe great teams, the champions.”
#4. PSG, Monaco and Lyon did not succeed, so why not Brest?
Let’s leave some space for the Western clubs, shall we?
#3. It’s raining a lot at the moment
We know that the Bretons are better in the rain.
#2. On May 31, 2025, it will rain in Munich
We looked at the weather, the final will be played under the fleet.
#1. Éric Roy, the 4th emperor
Pep Guardiola, Carlo Ancelotti, Zinédine Zidane, there are three to have conquered Europe over the last decade. Eric intends to achieve the same feat and enter the closed circle of football emperors.
So convinced? We do.
