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“You seem to be having trouble connecting”

Qhen my father died, the appointment at the funeral home took us a little less than three-quarters of an hour. Time to choose between oak and fir. A year and a half after his disappearance, we have, however, still not succeeded in hammering the last nail into his digital coffin. My father had left this world six months ago when his bank sent him a satisfaction questionnaire asking him to give a note at the meeting with the estate department following his death. “Whether positive, negative or neutral, your opinion will help us improve,” the message said.

The digital world is populated by ghosts who receive automatic emails, or to whom social networks suggest new friends that they will not take to heaven. Behind the multiplication of these virtual specters, a combination of automated tasks, algorithms and the inertia of large companies, which pretend not to have foreseen death… at least as long as the deceased pay their subscriptions.

Perhaps, from up there, the deceased laugh at our difficulties in closing their earthly accounts. Perhaps they are amused by the message from Amazon which, upon request to close a Prime account, sends its condolences and a list of documents to send and which, upon receipt, returns the same condolences and the same list of documents to send. But perhaps, too, they want to help us, ready to send us the passwords of their accounts by smoke signals through the clouds.

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How do we recognize them?

Digital ghosts remain subscribed to pay packages that they no longer watch and to telephone insurance plans that they no longer use. Their online accounts send secret codes to find their passwords on numbers that have been closed. They receive letters ordering them to sue if they do not pay their bills. Facebook suggests that their friends of friends become friends with them, and reminds their friends to wish them a happy birthday once a year. When their phone number is reassigned, their loved ones who have kept their name in their contact list receive messages to let them know that they have joined Telegram, Signal or other messaging services.

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How they speak

Digital ghosts don’t speak. But the messages they receive say: “In an effort to improve our customer performance, we would like to know the reasons for your departure. » “As part of an effort to improve our services, Agirc-Arrco is carrying out a satisfaction survey on the progress of your interview. » “You seem to be having trouble connecting. » “How likely are you to recommend PayPal to a friend or colleague?” » “You received a message. You will find this response in your email inbox. » “Invalid password. »

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