This September morning, Virginie, 46, takes to the road to defend her dissertation on “The failure of girls in mathematics in CP class ». This is the final stage of the dense and studious year experienced by this national education inspector returning to her studies. Concentrated, she goes over the points of her presentation in her head when her phone rings. She glances at the screen: her youngest sister is trying to contact her. She hesitates for a few seconds then picks up. “I told her I was going to my oral exam, but she quickly moved on and started complaining about our brother who never responds to messages. This is a recurring subject between us. We’ve already talked about it dozens of times”, remembers Virginie. After long minutes of conversation, the eldest hangs up and continues on her way. At the end of the day, she simply posted briefly on the WhatsApp group shared with her two sisters and her brother that she defended her dissertation and that everything went well.
Virginie is the eldest of four children, and she is used to her younger daughters – her brother rarely communicates by phone or messaging – calling her. “to complain”. This time, like all the others, she responded. “I could have ignored the call, she says. But we had missed each other several times and I knew she wanted to empty her bag. With my sisters, I receive their stories and their stories. This posture suits me, even if sometimes I am criticized for not responding quickly enough. » Thinking back, Virginie said to herself that, that day, perhaps it was she who would have been ” legitimate “ to ask for an attentive ear. But she didn't.
She says it bluntly, she feels a bit like “second mother” of his two sisters aged 42 and 37. « I always took care of Margaux, the youngest, whom I picked up from school when she was 3 years old. With her, I took on a very mothering role, and I loved it. » Margaux confirms: “I was such a fan of hers, she was perfection personified. When she looked at me, I felt super proud. » Thirty-four years later, the little girl who has become an adult confirms that her eldest holds a special place among her siblings. “Virginie is calm, thoughtful, she has extremely sound judgment. She doesn't confide very much, it's a fortress, and she maintains the collective structure. It's true that she's always there for me, but I find that a bit normal, continues Margaux in a burst of laughter. She is a step ahead in analyzing life, in how to function with our parents. Looking at it, I get a glimpse of what awaits me in the coming years. »
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