A new year means new goals – but sometimes the key to success isn’t what you do, but what you don’t do. At least that’s the opinion of Rolf Dobelli, who has examined how to live life well in several of his books.
Rolf Dobelli
bestselling author
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Rolf Dobelli, born in Lucerne in 1966, studied economics and obtained his doctorate in philosophy at the University of St. Gallen. He then worked as a manager and entrepreneur, notably for Swissair. He is the founder of WORLD.MINDS, an international community of minds from science, business and geopolitics. Dobelli writes novels and non-fiction books, including the bestsellers “The Art of Clear Thinking”, “The Art of Intelligent Action” as well as “The Art of the Good Life” and ” The digital art of living.” In 2024
His book “The Don’t List: 52 Ways to Avoid Life’s Biggest Mistakes” was published. Rolf Dobelli is married to the bestselling author Clara Maria Bagus. They live with their sons in Bern.
In his latest work, “The Not-To-Do List”, he goes further and lists behaviors to avoid. For the new year, here are five things that, according to him, cannot be missing from this list.
1. Avoid social media
Social networks are the perfect machine to fuel desire. Since, for the most part, only the most beneficial images and videos are shared, you’re bound to feel inadequate while scrolling. At the same time, they rob us of our attention: our brain is distracted, our concentration decreases and our productivity noticeably decreases. Rolf Dobelli believes that social media should have a permanent place on your “not to do list” for 2025.
2. Don’t be unreliable
People can go far, even without an exceptionally high IQ or creativity – as long as they are reliable. Reliability is often considered the most underestimated key to success. However, this is perhaps the most important factor. Intellectual brilliance or creativity alone does not protect against failure, while reliability provides a stable foundation. Anyone who is reliable has a solid foundation and cannot fail so easily.
3. Don’t set unrealistic goals
The goal of remaining attractive into old age or living forever is hopeless – no matter how many vitamins you take. The pursuit of constant happiness or fame is also unrealistic. Instead, ask yourself: What kind of person do I want to become this year?
“We don’t know exactly what makes us happy. “That’s why it’s easier to avoid things that might make you unhappy,” Dobelli believes.
Rolf Dobelli / Color box
4. Don’t always say yes to everything
Giving time to others, being there for them and helping them are admirable actions. They enrich our lives and give them meaning – but only to a certain extent. This point is reached when you realize that you are losing yourself in the process.
For each request, take a maximum of five seconds to decide and answer “No” by default.
Dobelli’s advice: practice the “five-second no.” For each request, give yourself a maximum of five seconds to decide and default to “no” unless the request is clearly important. Avoid phrases like “I’m thinking about it” or “Maybe” when you really mean “No.”
5. Don’t try to change people
The personalities of others cannot be changed – neither by motivation nor by pressure. Avoid situations in which you try to change others. It is often better to distance yourself from people with whom you don’t get along.
Anyone who marries with the aim of changing partners chooses the path of misfortune. In an existing relationship, you have three options: accept your partner’s whims, change yourself, or consider breaking up.
The conclusion
Create your personal “don’t do list” for 2025. Instead of constantly searching for what will make you healthy, focus on avoiding unhealthy habits. Instead of focusing on getting rich, avoid predictable losses. Instead of analyzing what makes a relationship successful, pay attention to what can cause it to fail.
And finally: Instead of chasing happiness, eliminate everything that blocks your path. Good year!
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