To test his speed in making decisions – and reassure the French – Jérome de Warzée then asked him a direct question: what would he do in the event of a new fire at Notre-Dame de Paris?
“Notre-Dame de Paris burns again. There, now. What are you doing?“, asks the presenter. “It burns… it burns. Firefighters go to the fire… Ah, it’s hot… Notre-Dame, this architectural splendor whose construction began in the 12th century“, begins François Bayrou, totally off topic. “No, but it’s burning there, you have to act quickly”insists the presenter. “Yes, I heard your request, and I will take care of it immediately.” then replies the fake Prime Minister, taking his phone. “Ah, are you calling the firefighters?” supposes Jérome de Warzée. “Uh no, I’m sending a text to Marine (Le Pen)”replies the comedian, triggering laughter from the audience.
“And what did she answer you?” asks the presenter again. “Blame the migrants”announces the fake François Bayrou, provoking new bursts of laughter. “But you can’t let Marine Le Pen guide your decisions.”insists the presenter. “And for the burning cathedral, what do we do?“, he continues.
A few seconds of reflection later, the fake minister offers a “solution”: “Okay, that’s okay, I have an idea. The immigrant responsible for this new fire will be sent home. It doesn’t matter if he’s a one-legged minor.” An answer that leaves “Élisabeth Borne” doubtful: “But how does he know he’s a one-legged immigrant minor?”
“It comes from Marine. She gets it from Jordan Bardella, who knows it from reliable sources, who gets it from a journalist from reliable sources”explains the pseudonym François Bayrou. “An investigative journalist? “Élisabeth Borne” then quips ironically. “Yes, Cyril Hanouna”he concludes, once again provoking general hilarity.
-King Philippe invites himself to the party
While the sketch seemed to be coming to an end, it was without counting on the entry of the false King Philippe on stage, in a slow motion worthy of a cinematic effect. “We are going to speed up,” says Jérome de Warzée. “Yes, if these two had had to negotiate the Yalta Accords, World War II would have ended in 1964.” balances Isabelle Hauben, in her role of Élisabeth Borne.
After a few crazy exchanges, the king confided to the pseudo François Bayrou: “II’m really happy to meet you, you who are so dynamic, so fast, so efficient.“A flattery which delights the Prime Minister, who lets out a long “Ooooh…I came.” A line that provokes another burst of laughter, before King Philippe, played by Martin Charlier, concludes with hilarious composure: “Sometimes it feels good.”
A sketch to be found in The Big Cactus from this Thursday, January 16 in full on Auvio.
Related News :