It could all have been so different.
Armenian minnows FC Noah had the first clear sight of goal in what descended into a record-breaking 8-0 thrashing at Stamford Bridge on Thursday night. Goncalo Gregorio squandered the golden opening, lashing the ball directly at Filip Jorgensen.
Perhaps it would have finished 8-1, but the Chelsea goalkeeper was not a passive spectator despite the one-sided scoreline. Noah rattled off 15 shots, seven of which were on target – registering more efforts on goal than Manchester United, Liverpool or Manchester City managed against the Blues this season.
Jorgensen stood firm and was not alone in shining on a night which saw Chelsea record the largest win in the Conference League’s short history.
The relief washing over Marc Guiu was palpable. There was no sense of restrained celebration for the 18-year-old given the level of opposition he was up against after stuffing in Chelsea’s second goal of the night.
Guiu’s jubilation was understandable. The Barcelona academy graduate has been firmly locked in Chelsea’s second team setup since his summer arrival and marked his debut in this European competition with a calamitous open-goal miss. Guiu never stopped hassling and harrying on Thursday, winning the ball to slot in his maiden goal for the club before chasing back to spark the move which led to Joao Felix’s first strike of the night.
Ahead of Noah’s visit on Thursday night, Enzo Maresca revealed the sense of “shame” that envelops him each time he leaves Joao Felix out of Chelsea’s starting lineup for a Premier League fixture.
The £42m summer arrival has amassed a grand total of 122 top-flight minutes and is yet to start a league game this season. Felix did nothing to harm his case for more game time in midweek, scoring Chelsea’s fourth and sixth goals on a night where he perhaps should have left with the match ball given the number of opportunities his craft carved open.
A week of football in Europe’s third-tier club competition would not be complete without a goal from Christopher Nkunku. The former RB Leipzig forward has scored in all five of Chelsea’s appearances in the competition and netted twice on Thursday night.
Dropped from Chelsea’s Premier League lineup after ambling through an opening-weekend defeat to Manchester City, the former Bundesliga top scorer unsurprising looks a cut above the eclectic mix of continental opposition.
Nkunku didn’t quite have it all his own way against Noah – he passed up at least three big chances – but the Frenchman took those frustrations out on his 76th-minute penalty. Chelsea’s Conference League killer blasted his spot kick down the middle with such power that Ognjen Cancarevic did well to dive out of the way.
It has been quite the fall from grace for £106.8m Enzo Fernandez. As recently as December 2022, he registered more touches, passes and tackles than any other player in the World Cup final. The Argentine once again stood out on Thursday night, but was getting the better of a club formed in 2017 rather than Kylian Mbappe’s France.
Chelsea’s skipper on the night played the final pass in the buildup to his side’s first four goals – which arrived in a nine-minute blitz – but had his evening cut short after being hauled off at half-time, even though he’ll likely remain on the bench for Arsenal’s trip to Stamford Bridge in the Premier League on Sunday afternoon.
Romeo Lavia and Moises Caicedo are currently ahead in Maresca’s pecking order but this was a decent reminder from Fernandez about what he can do – below-par opponent quality or not.
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