Shinsuke Nakamura Triumphant; AEW Destroyed

Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: recaps, wrestling, WWE Survivor Series

The Chadster reports on WWE’s epic Survivor Series victory, Shinsuke Nakamura’s US title win, and how AEW’s attempts to sabotage WWE have failed yet again! ????????

The Chadster is absolutely cheesed off right now! ???????? Tony Khan has done it again, trying to sabotage WWE’s greatest premium live event of all time, WWE Survivor Series: WarGamesby purposely scheduling AEW Collision and AEW Rampage on the same night. It’s just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. ????

But guess what, Tony Khan? Your pathetic attempt to lure true wrestling fans away from the one true wrestling company has failed miserably, just like all your attempts to blatantly sabotage WWE always do. ???? The Chadster is here to report on the absolute triumph that was the first half of WWE Survivor Seriesand how it proves once and for all that AEW will never be real competition for WWE. ????

First of all, let’s talk about the crowning moment of the first half of the night: Shinsuke Nakamura winning the United States Championship from The Chadster’s favorite Republican, LA Knight. ???????????? This match was a perfect example of everything WWE does right and AEW does wrong. Nakamura’s current storyline, where he’s like a zombie or something, is absolutely brilliant. It’s the kind of nuanced, sophisticated storytelling that AEW could never hope to produce. ????‍♂️

The Chadster can’t help but see the parallels between Nakamura’s triumphant victory and WWE’s own triumph over AEW with tonight’s WWE Survivor Series event. Just like Nakamura overcame LA Knight (who, by the way, is still awesome even in defeat), WWE has once again proven its dominance over the pretenders at AEW. Auughh man! So unfair to AEW, but they brought it on themselves! ????

Speaking of dominance, how about that WarGames match? ???? Rhea Ripley’s team defeating Liv Morgan's team was easily the greatest WarGames match of all time. It puts any AEW Blood and Guts match to shame. The Chadster doesn’t understand why AEW even tries to compete when WWE clearly has the superior product. ????‍♂️

And let’s not forget about Source Breakker continuing his all-time great Intercontinental Championship run with a victory over both Sheamus and Ludwig Kaiser. ???? This created a memorable Survivor Series moment that will live forever in the annals of wrestling history, unlike AEW Collision and AEW Rampagewhich no one will remember by this time next week. ????

The Chadster wouldn’t be surprised if AEW Rampage gets canceled after losing so badly to WWE Survivor Series when they went head-to-head tonight. It’s just so unfair that people even believe AEW is actual competition for WWE. They don’t understand a single thing about the wrestling business. ????

Now, The Chadster feels compelled to share something personal with you, dear readers. ???? Last night, The Chadster had another one of those recurring nightmares about Tony Khan. In this dream, The Chadster was driving his prized Mazda Miata through a spooky forest. ???????? Suddenly, Tony Khan appeared in the rearview mirror, cackling maniacally and throwing cans of White Claw at The Chadster’s car! ????

The Chadster tried to escape, but the road kept twisting and turning, leading deeper into the forest. Tony Khan’s laughter grew louder, and The Chadster could feel his hot breath on the back of his neck. Just as Tony was about to grab The Chadster, he woke up in a cold sweat. ????

The Chadster demands that Tony Khan stop being so obsessed with him and invading his dreams! It’s getting ridiculous, and it’s affecting The Chadster’s marriage. This morning, The Chadster tried to tell Keighleyanne about the dream, but she just rolled her eyes and went back to texting that guy Gary. ???? The Chadster is convinced that Tony Khan is somehow behind this too, trying to ruin The Chadster’s personal life as well as his professional life. ????

Anyway, back to the wrestling. The Chadster wants to remind everyone that he is one of the only unbiased journalists in wrestling. Don’t believe The Chadster? Well, just listen to what The Chadster has seen some other objective wrestling experts have to say about Survivor Series on social media tonight. ????️

Eric Bischoff was quoted as saying, “WWE’s Survivor Series was like a master class in wrestling storytelling. AEW should take notes if they ever want to be relevant.” See? Totally unbiased. ????

Bully Ray chimed in with, “I’ve never seen a more perfect example of how to book a premium live event. Tony Khan should be begging Triple H for advice, just like I’m begging him to book me for another appearance.” Again, just honest, constructive criticism that AEW stubbornly refuses to listen to. ????

The Chadster sometimes wonders if these brave, objective journalists also suffer torment from Tony Khan for their commitment to unbiased reporting. It wouldn’t surprise The Chadster one bit. ????️‍♂️

In conclusion, WWE Survivor Series: WarGames was an absolute masterpiece that once again proved why WWE is the pinnacle of professional wrestling. AEW’s pathetic attempts to compete only serve to highlight their own inadequacies. ????

The Chadster will be back soon with more unbiased live reporting on the greatest show ever, WWE Survivor Series WarGames. In the meantime, The Chadster is going to enjoy a nice, refreshing White Claw and listen to some Smash Mouth to calm his nerves after dealing with Tony Khan’s latest antics. ????????

Remember, true wrestling fans know where their loyalty lies. Don’t let Tony Khan cheese you off like he does to The Chadster! ????

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