We were starting to come back from it. A little. Not completely, but still, we were less panicked than on the evening of November 5. Trump is elected, Trump is elected. There’s nothing more we can do about it. Especially since we were never able to do anything about it. Maybe it won’t be so bad after all.
Published at 6:00 a.m.
And then we said to ourselves that we had two months of grace left, with Trump taking office on January 20, 2025. Until then, can we think of anything else?
No, we can’t! Because the embarrassing septuagenarian has continued to increase his nominations since his election. Each of them portends an apocalyptic future. Apocalyptic being, here, an understatement.
To Justice, the former future president appointed Matt Gaetz, elected from Florida. Far-right man, with weak ethics and parties extremes, Matt Gaetz is a loyal Trump supporter, a mega MAGA whose first mission will be to wipe out all Mar-a-Lago ego lawsuits and prosecute his enemies.
To the secretary of state, the eternal Bronzé named Marco Rubio, the senator from Florida. Supporter of the hard line against China and Iran, he would be inclined to eliminate aid to Ukraine, in its conflict with Russia.
At Defense, the Clockwork Orange has appointed Pete Hegseth, TV host. It goes from “ Hi Hello » from Fox News to the Pentagon leadership. A former infantry officer, he has never led a large institution; here he is in command of a budget of 850 billion dollars and 3.4 million soldiers. If we trust his statements, the next country against which the United States will go to war is… Wokism.
At Homeland Security, 45e et 47e President nominated Kristi Noem, the governor of South Dakota. Fortunately he didn’t appoint her to animal protection, Mme Noem shot her young dog because she wouldn’t listen to him. Her biography doesn’t say if she ate it.
At National Security, the guy Donald appointed Mike Waltz, another elected official from Florida. Waltz doesn’t like China or Russia, but no longer wants to support Ukraine’s war effort. He is considered to be a hawk, with some observers even going so far as to say that he is a real jerk.
At the National Intelligence Directorate, the Muscular Ear appointed Tulsi Gabbard. A Democratic defector, she changed her mind, and not almost, going from a Bernie Sanders supporter to a Trump fan. You have to do it! Mme Gabbard is a fan of conspiracy theories spread by Russia. We risk no longer having the information we had. Finally, we’re going to find out if Elvis is alive!
To the new Department of Government Effectiveness, the Golfer-in-Chief has named multi-billionaire Elon Musk and Republican billionaire Vivek Ramaswamy, whose name is worth more than that of Marwah Rizky in Scrabble (the MP having revealed this week on X, that his name is worth 49 points).
See an X publication from Marwah Rizky
After reducing Twitter, Elon Musk will therefore work to reduce the American civil service. To put an X on that. Apparently the founder of Tesla and SpaceX just bought the book Do you really need it? by Pierre-Yves McSween.
Let’s not forget the most flambergastous of appointments: at Health, the Sergeant-Detergent has appointed Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Mr. Junior is a notorious anti-vaccine. You can’t make this up! We better wash our hands and keep our distance for the next four years.
And that’s not all! I learned, first of all, the next appointments that Donald Trump will announce shortly.
To Status of Women, Andrew Tate.
At Food, Hannibal Lecter.
To Culture, Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne.
To Education, Hulk Hogan.
To the Family, Don Corleone.
At Fitness, Ronald McDonald.
At the bike paths, Harley-Davidson.
To the American Red Cross, Dracula.
To the Food and Drug Administration, El Chapo.
To the Environment, Henry David Thoreau. Yes, I know that Thoreau, history’s first environmentalist, is dead. Trump knows it too. That’s why he named it. Under Trump, the environment is dead.
And surely the most surprising of all the upcoming appointments: to the Youth Department, Trump will appoint Joe Biden.
Let’s make the most of the two months we have left.
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