These signs that can alert parents

The management of children in certain daycare centers is called into question in the book “Les ogres” published this Wednesday, September 18. Attitude, physical traces… Certain more or less apparent signals can indicate a problem to parents.

After investigating the support of elderly people in nursing homes, Victor Castanet returns with The Ogreshis new book in bookstores this Wednesday, September 18. The journalist exposes the excesses of certain private daycare centers and denounces acts of mistreatment, including physical violence.

“There is this private nursery near Lille, where there are nine children who were allegedly victims of abuse,” he said in an interview with AFP. “Beatings, scratches, punishments in the dark, humiliation, deprivation of food. These children still have regular nightmares.”

Rare incidents, according to pediatrician Fabienne Cahn-Sellem to BFMTV.com, but obviously “unbearable”. For parents, these difficult stories can raise questions in the middle of the back-to-school period. The specialist gives BFMTV.com the signals that should attract the attention of fathers and mothers.

• Test the waters during the adaptation period

It all starts when the child arrives at the nursery, during the so-called “adaptation” period which generally lasts two weeks – the child’s first moments in a new place. Parents must try to read the attitude of the reference assistant: is she caring? Empathetic? How does she express herself when she addresses the parents? To the child?

While the attitude does not in itself indicate abuse, these elements can suggest a “lack of kindness,” in the words of the pediatrician. “It’s already annoying, damaging,” emphasizes Fabienne Cahn-Sellem.

• Crying, inhibition… Signs of “suffering”

Once the adjustment period has passed, other signs of discomfort may become apparent. A child who cries or screams excessively when going to daycare may be an indicator.

“We can say that a child who is not happy to go to daycare beyond this adaptation period, who cries when going there or who is found having cried a lot, a lot or with a broken voice (…) can attract attention,” explains the health professional.

Conversely, other signs of “suffering” can be more discreet. Rather than very visible demonstrations, these are deficiencies that should raise a red flag. For example, when a child is “inhibited, no longer babbles” as usual.

• Unexplained physical injuries?

Physical abuse is rarer in daycare centers, particularly due to the simultaneous presence of several supervisors in the establishment. But the presence of unexplained traces can be a warning sign.

“Of course, if there is no reliable explanation for a fall, a bruise, an injury… Parents need to go further and try to find out a little more. Even if it is true that the assistants do not have their eyes fixed 100%, permanently, on the children, it is part of their job.”

More broadly, the fact that a caregiver cannot explain precisely what the child did during the day, whether he or she played, ate, slept, may be indicative of a problem.

• Dirty diapers, unsuitable meals: weak signals

Some acts, while not always considered abuse, are problematic. This is the case, for example, of children who keep dirty diapers for too long, particularly in establishments that only change them at set times. This can be revealed by the appearance of dermatitis, a skin irritation.

To observe it, a simple comparison between the appearance of the buttocks on the weekend and those of the week is enough. “I ask parents: do you find that your child’s buttocks are better on Sunday evening after having had them all weekend than during the week? (…) Does their buttocks burn again on Tuesday evening, when they were given perfect buttocks on Monday morning?” advises the pediatrician.

Another problem is meals. In some establishments, portions tend to shrink, despite a national plan of recommendations on nutrition.

A point that is more difficult for parents to observe. But some, like in Vitrolles in Bouches-du-Rhône, have managed to identify it. “We hadn’t even left the nursery yet and she was already asking for a bottle, milk, water or cakes,” a mother told BFM Marseille Provence in March 2023. Another simply decided to enter the establishment to check the portions – and noticed major shortcomings.

• Controls by parents or professionals?

Not every parent can decide to inspect the nursery at will one evening or one morning. However, solutions for reasonable external control exist at the local level, in the pediatrician’s experience. In some nurseries, parents appoint a delegate, as they would in schools. They could ensure proper compliance. “It’s a good system,” she assures.

The specialist regrets, however, that pediatricians no longer intervene in the establishments. The professionals were training there and could detect potential mistreatment. From now on, health referents, who are not present on site permanently, carry out this mission.