Montreal syndrome | The Press

After the syndromes of Stockholm, Florence and other cities around the world, it is time for Montreal to have its own syndrome: conophobia. At least that’s what an eminent psychiatrist in the metropolis suggests.

But no, not the phobia of idiots. Orange cone phobia. No joke.

By reading the article from D^r Emmanuel Stip in a special issue of the magazine Mental health in QuebecI wondered if it was an April Fool’s joke in November. The tone of certain passages is decidedly ironic. Basically, however, the psychiatrist swears to be very serious.

“Conophobia is a neologism to signify the birth of a young syndrome linked to the growing observation of an original evil and suffering invading the metropolis of Quebec: anxiety in relation to a clearly identified object that we call it the Cone,” reads the peer-reviewed article.

The former director of the psychiatry department at the University of Montreal says he is observing more and more cases of Montrealers who are “stressed, anxious” at the sight of the road markers omnipresent in the streets of the metropolis. He himself admits to having “lost his mind” after circling his house for 20 minutes, behind the wheel of his car, unable to make his way through an impenetrable orange forest.

“I saw behavior of rage, of revolt,” says Emmanuel Stip. On social media, viral videos showed people getting out of their cars to throw cones! » These could be, according to the psychiatrist, the “first behavioral anomalies observable in the population”, indicating the suffering and feeling of helplessness of a growing number of citizens.

“Fuck you!” And fuck this city! “, shouted a motorist at a flagger in September, before furiously kicking a cone. A year earlier, another exasperated Montrealer was filmed strolling in the middle of a street and throwing a packet of cones at the end of his arms. More and more, road flaggers say they are afraid – and not just of being hit by a car.

They fear furious motorists just as much, if not more.

Everyone is familiar with Stockholm syndrome, which describes a victim’s sympathy for their attacker. This phenomenon refers to a famous bank robbery that occurred in the Swedish capital in 1973, during which the hostages ended up developing an attachment to their captors. There is also Lima syndrome, which describes the empathy that an attacker can feel towards his victim.

Florence syndrome, for its part, refers to the discomfort caused by contemplating the works exhibited at the Uffizi Museum. Yes, this uneasiness really exists: the guards of the Florentine museum are even trained to intervene with tourists who are victims of it, struck down by so much beauty.

Montreal syndrome describes a different kind of discomfort. A little less… graceful, let’s say.

Nevertheless, Montrealers maintain a love-hate relationship with their cones, as if they had developed Stockholm syndrome towards the big cylinders who have taken their city hostage. As proof, the key rings, cups and other souvenirs bearing the image of the cones that are now sold to tourists.

The cones have become icons of Montreal. They are part of the identity of the metropolis. Hence the relevance of speaking of “Montreal syndrome” to describe the phobia of these road markers, believes Emmanuel Stip.

The psychiatrist admits that to his knowledge, there has not yet been a hospitalization caused by the mere Dantesque vision of a pile of cones obstructing a street, often for days, even weeks, without valid reason – a absurdity which would accentuate the feeling of helplessness of patients.

Well, sick… Conophobia is not a recognized mental illness, of course. Not yet, anyway. That said, since the publication of his article, D^r Stip claims to have received several emails from colleagues who have observed clear cases of cone distress.

In his article, Emmanuel Stip offers some “aids and remedies for individuals already suffering from this insidious illness”. This could, for example, take the form of an annual day called “Revolt of the Cones”, during which the people would throw the city’s cones into the air (without compromising road safety, of course).

Otherwise, the psychiatrist suggests (with a touch of irony, you will have understood) a music therapy based on the rhythm of the “cone drum” type, or even an acceptance and commitment therapy which could help the conophobic to “cultivate a rich and meaningful life, accepting what is beyond one’s control”.

Personally, I like the idea of ​​using “cones as dumbbells under the supervision of kinesiologists specializing in mental health”, which would have the advantage of preventing potential cardiovascular diseases. Or that of “replacing each cone with a tree”, an ecological project which would reduce traffic in addition to improving mental health…

Let’s hope Valérie Plante takes notes (or not).