Many parents feel a great deal of guilt in parenting. This feeling, although well-intentioned, can lead to make bad decisions for children: “I see time and time again how guilt prevents parents from making healthy, wise decisions when dealing with their adult children’s challenges. Even if there is some truth behind some of your past parenting shortcomings, Condemning yourself to irrational levels of guilt will likely hamper your ability to be effective to support your adult child today”explains Jeffrey Bernstein, psychologist, in the columns of Psychology Today. When a child is in trouble, parents may want to help. But in this endeavor, three behaviors can cause problems, according to the psychologist.
1. Coming to the rescue too quickly.
“When you rush to solve your adult child’s problems, you thwart his or her opportunities to develop and practice independent problem-solving skills.”explains the psychologist, who recommends that you listen to your child without trying to do everything for them.
Being in the best possible position to help your child
2. Take responsibility for the difficulties and failures of a child who has become an adult.
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